Oh the deployment blues.

I miss strange little things about Scott.
The way his voice is super hoarse and deep in the morning.
The fact that he wears a watch every day.
The way that his jeans are always just a little too tight on his bum.
He always smells so good.
He cares more about his hair than I do.
When he tries to "wrestle" with me but really just folds me into a pretzel and laughs about how weak and stuck I am.
He plans dates where I get to pick the movie/restaurant but decides against every choice I make because I must have forgotten about a better option (his option).
 He loves holidays as much as I do.
I miss how he always put his hand on my face or the nape of my neck whenever he kisses me.
 I love that he always speaks so highly of me.

The thing I miss most is his mere presence. He has an aura about him that is radiant.
180 days down.

shoot for the moon.

perfectionism has always seemed to hold us back. it is the greatest enemy to our sweet messy beautiful screwed up human lives. it keeps us down and if you let it, you become the victim of oppression by a silly characteristic you dont actually need. we need to learn how to fight it and rise above and realize that there isnt any person in this world that we need to try so hard to please besides YOU. do you want to wake up one day in your later years towards the end of your life and you never wrote that book you wanted to write; visited the country you so desperately wanted to see;  you didnt go run and jump in that pool or river or ocean because your thighs were jiggly or your tummy wasnt as flat as those girls in that magazine; you never ordered that dessert in fear it would end up as fat somewhere else on your body so you chose to not indulge; or maybe you were like the rest of us who get so wrapped up in people pleasing that you forgot to have a jam packed life full of creativity, spontaneity, imagination, and just flat out radical goofiness. i have a feeling you will wake up on that day without much life left and it will break your little heart. fight back. fight the urge to think twice. dont let others dictate how you will live your life. rid your life of influential cancers like people pleasing. as of late i have definitely been on the path of realization. ive done things, seen things, lived through things, and now i am changing my direction and i dont think i would mind ending up at the finish line i can see. "when i think of you i see babies, a garden full of life, oh and that green, green grass, spread out for miles." if you want to love someone, do it. if you want to start a family together, do it. dont let the thought of age or opinions of others hold you back. that line was from the man i gave my heart to and we are on our path to become parents. the joy you feel when doing what you want and doing it wholeheartedly, oh is it overwhemling but boy is it swell.

adventure time.

So Scott and i found out that come December we will be welcoming a little tiny into this world. What an exciting couple months it has been. Although he just left for his deployment to Afghanistan, we couldn't be happier.

i never thought i was old enough or ready for a baby and when i found out we were expecting, it took me by surprise and i was a bit scared. The moment i told Scott was the moment i knew everything was going to be okay. His eyes swelled with tears and his face completely lit up. Our whole life is changing and what a wonderful way for it to begin.

Babies are pretty neat. i dont think there is a way to be a "perfect" mother or father, but you can bet your bottom dollar that we will give this nugget the best life imaginable.

HOORAY FOR LIFE.

Doggie Dash 2014

So this past weekend i ventured up to Portland for the Annual Doggie Dash put on and sponsored by the Oregon Humane Society. Being the crazy dog obsessed gal that i am, it was as if i died and went to heaven. There were dogs and puppies of all shapes and sizes, a big pancake breakfast (one of my fave foods) and i got to bring my sister's puppy for the 5k run! It was a blast to say the least. All proceeds went to the humane societies and boy did they raise a lot of money. What an awesome fundraiser, right? It is the biggest dog walk/run in the west and i cant wait to do it again next year. i would encourage anyone who is around next year to join and help this cause. 54 dogs were adopted on Saturday and over $30k was raised! talk about a wonderful turn out and a bright future for puppies all over Oregon.

Sometimes are okay sometimes.

• sometimes i wonder why it’s so wrong to eat brownies or cookies for breakfast. 
• sometimes i lay in bed for hours watching Netflix.
• sometimes i forget to shave my legs for many, many days. 
• sometimes i lose sight of what the goal is.
• sometimes i am rightfully accused of never answering my phone.
• sometimes i reread Harry Potter just so i can feel like there is more to life.
• sometimes it’s the thought of an avocado that gets me out of bed in the morning.
• sometimes i drink a whole bottle of wine because im over 21 and i can.
• sometimes i am really shy. sometimes i can’t shut up.
• sometimes i fail. miserably.
• sometimes i have to stop myself from saying “i love you soooo much” for the 134th time in a day to my rabbit. but sometimes i just can’t help it.
• sometimes i give Scott ridiculous nicknames like rabbit.
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  

"is your life really that perfect?"

that is a question I get a lot. i never said my life was perfect. it’s not. no one has a perfect life,  but i choose to look at what i am blessed with rather than what i do not have. i work hard to find the joy in my day-to-day.  regardless, i have terrible days just like anyone. while i try to be honest about the entire picture, i like to keep this blog on the positive side.  please do not ever look at my blog (or anyone’s blog) and compare your life to it. a saying i love, “comparison is the thief of joy,”  has never rung truer than in the social media world.  i can’t choose what you’ll take away from my blog, but i hope you’ll take away a message of finding the joy in what is around you, in your family and friends, and in your surroundings over anything else. you are what you are. you get what you work for. work hard for what you want.

Love YOU.

Valentine's day is approaching and i think there is a divide. Although i do not believe it is a true holiday, i love it. Single, in a relationship, married, divorced, whatever your status, enjoy the day where you can be as creepy and lovey as you want without looking nuts! Thanksgiving is a day to show everyone how thankful you are for everything you have been blessed with. Think of this as the next step!
You also don't have to celebrate this day with anyone special. As a 21 year old girl, i can name 100 things i dislike about myself in a minute. This valentines day i plan on not only showing those i care about how much i love them, but i want to spend it making sure i know what a terrific person i am. i want to be happy with myself and practice self love and erase self loathing, even for just a day!
it makes me so sad when some of the most beautiful people i know struggle with self image and self worth. i have a friend who has constantly struggled with weight and never being happy with where she is at. She is one of the most positive, joyous people i know with a ginormous heart that truly can bring a smile to anyone's face! To me she is one of the most beautiful people i have ever met, inside and out.
We all struggle with things we wish we could change but we also need to be happy throughout the process! i want to make 2014 the year i truly began to love myself, every part of me! Let's make Valentines day the beginning of something beautiful! Know your worth and fall in love with every aspect of your life!

Boost that immune system!

With the amount of people coming down with all sorts of illnesses, i've stepped up my smoothie and juice game to jump start my immune system! A lot of us cannot afford to get sick right now, being such busy bodies, so double your fruit and veggie intake people!

This weekend i decided to make myself an 18ounce fruit and veggie smoothie and boy was it delicious! it was also a great source for energy!
My smoothie consisted of:
Spinach
Broccoli
Carrots
Strawberries
Blackberries
Blueberries
Raspberries
Apples
Almond milk
ice
Blend and feel awesome:)